I'm fixed.

Everything is changing directions. It seems to be darker and gloomier ahead, but its out of my physical limits to pull back. It seems like falling into the dark region's the only choice. No big words can motivate, no influence can encourage, no one can aid cause the anchor's broken. The ship's heading right down into the vertex. But will it?

A.Maths= Infection Point, Limits, Falling, Vertex.

Try connecting these dots.

Have you ever played this game called, "Pass down the message"? Very often the perception of the last person on the line is very different from that of the first person, though the exact same message is supposed to be passed down. This is perhaps, one of the greatest imperfections of life. The way we conceive information.

Have you ever played this game called, "Connect the dots"? After linking up those dots on the paper, you took a second look and nothing was emerging from the image even though you thought you're linking up something? You looked again, and realized you have linked the wrong dots in the first place. People think they can connect the dots, they think they can conceive the resulting image just by looking at those dots, just by their first impression. They link up the dots according to their impression, and the dots never lead them to anything because the dots are not meant to be linked up in the first place. Perhaps, impressions by itself, is a defect.

Our impression leads to our perception. Impressions are like random dots on a surface, while perceptions are the images that we plot in our minds before we even start linking up those dots. We get impressions everyday in our life, but why do we always have to connect the dots? Sometimes, they really have no meaning at all. By linking up those random impression, one would only get a messed up image  that looks more complicated than a 6th Dimensional  Orb structure.

I want to take things in life as it is. Capture these impressions, make them beautiful, yet making sure I don't make a perception up of it. Why bother making perceptions when impressions by itself are blissfully appealing. Don't make a judgement, don't attempt to plot the dots, just appreciate it. But very soon, I will be getting myself a magical pen, a pen that I can use to help me plot these dots, without me forming any initial perception of what the image will look like eventually. I'm very confident that this pen will help me form the most beautiful picture out of these random dots. This pen is just, magical.

My Magical Olympus Pen.

PS: I want to leave many different impressions on many different people in this post. I wrote it this way. Draw a perception based on it if you want. But honestly, I dislike such perceptions that complicates life. Words are just words.

Till Long,

Peyu.

Sometimes you do not get the things you want, the way you want it to be, and at the time you want it to happen.
It is like how you get tired of watching the clouds go by and still sit at that very spot waiting. You know you sat at that spot on the garden bench for quite sometime, almost all your life. You could get the hang of it, the momentum of the long wait. Then an old man dressed simply would walk by and take that seat next to you. He would then ask in a gentle voice, almost a whisper, "Hello, what are you waiting for." You were taken aback because you had never seen anyone before. In this land filled with nothing but an empty garden bench and truckloads of white fluffy clouds, no one came by. So I sat and waited. He came by and talked to me, so i told him everything i could think of. He was a kind old man and was wise and honest. He seemed to know everything and he could do anything, so i began to ask for things. I wanted houses and beautiful meadows and all the lovely things i could think of. He gave them all to me. Soon my world was filled with golden trees which grew ruby fruits, jade grass blades and sapphire streams.
He sat on the same bench as he watched me discover all the beautiful things he had given to me. I realised that he began to grow even older but he still smiled as i walked towards all the new things.
But soon ruby fruits and diamond dew were not enough, i began asking for big houses, fast cars, all the richest and everything else. He gave them all to me.
The same thing happened, he watched me as i walk towards those things he had blessed me with, and he was delighted that i loved them, but he never ceased to age. His wrinkles began to crease even more as he grinned at me. It began to seep deep down into his skin.
I stayed in the mansion he gave me, i slept on the huge bed and had silk pillows and all but the old man continued to sit on that old and creaking bench. He never came in.
But i was asking for too much.
I realized that nothing could ever please me, so what was i chasing for. In that empty mansion, there was no one else and i could not understand why i asked for that. The bench we sat on began to grow rusty and soon the old man stood up and called me.
I walked out of my house politely and went towards him.
He told me that there is nothing that actually wanted for. All that i wanted were nothing at all, and he took them all back. Nothing but clouds were left.
He told me that all i have to do is sit and wait. As time passes, everything will be revealed and you will get everything you can ever want.
I sat with that old man everyday and waited as time passed, things came by and went away, but only the old man stayed.

Wait.

Changing Course

Its been steering into the darkest valley, seeking for the brightest light towards the end. But the further it cruises, the darker it seems. Maybe its time to end the journey, to turn back, and to re-plot its course. Its time to change course. At least, I'm sure it's brighter at the end where it all began. So Ahoy! Get on the deck, for we will roll up the anchor and turn back. Wish me luck my friends, for its gona be yet another harsh journey

Time to start running, not away, but across. Catch me if you can.

A familiar stranger.

Yes peeps! I'm back after a 1+2+3+4+5+6+7+8+9-5 days in Shanghai! The stay was great!

You can just go on to Facebook to see those pictures that my wonderful "new but close" friends had tagged me in. I know that its a little too anti-climax here for me to not talk about my Shanghai Immersion, but well, since I've always emphasized that a picture meant a thousands words, I guess those pictures on Facebook will do fine. I'm too lazy to journal about it, nor even upload the pictures from own camera ever since writing journal was compulsory as part of my assessment there. But but but! If you still want to hear from me what exactly happened over the LONG period of time at somewhere so FAR away, you can always feel free to make an appointment with me. I'll tell you everything day by day word for word regarding what happened there, face to face. Of course, I only entertain appointment venues at places with ambiance not lousier than Coffee Bean or Starbucks (Since I got myself a Starbucks Tumbler not long ago)

Talking about stuff I bought, I also just got myself a new Ipod Touch 3g! Not from China of course, I proclaim it a "Made in China" Singaporean. AHAHAHs. I'm laughing at my own not funny joke. Perhaps I'm very affected by the "School Reopen Blues". So! Do recommend a noobie like me useful or fun apps to waste my time away!

Now, for the more complicated side of this post.

I think I've yet again lost some sense of direction as this new semester begins. I hate to follow the crowd, I like to find my own way. Yet, sometimes while venturing too far, its saddening to see others reaching their destination much faster than you. I've learnt to appreciate the extra sceneries that I get to enjoy more than those people who arrived at their destination faster. But sometimes, I still wonder whether its all worth it. It always felt like something is missing, missing from my life that is preventing me from seeking out further, unmanned areas. Somehow, I knew that its been lost for a very long time, yet, its significance is growing day by day as other motivations diminish. Yet, I'm ever so afraid to grab hold of it, or to even identify it for its just like, a familiar stranger to me.

Not matter what, you, Familiar Stranger, I know one day, just one day, not only will I identify you, but will also stand by you to seek out greater purposes. The problem is, who are you? where are you? when will you expose your true identity?

PS: It felt like I'm writing the prologue for an upcoming trailer.

We are on our own paths, yet paths that are intertwined.

For my friends, this post is dedicated to you.

Recently, I've been thinking about many things. What else can my tiny brain do? It can't do sports, it can't play games, it can't woo, it can't draw, it can't sing, neither can it play any instruments. So, I've been out with some of my closest friends since my 10-day holidays started. They've been great company. Knowing that I'll be away for a rather long period, they never failed to turn me down whenever I ask them out. These are people who I know will be truly there.

I'm really not joking when I tell you guys I want you to be both my best-men in my wedding, and speak my eulogy in my funeral, in case I proceeded on earlier. That's how I appreciate you guys. Whenever I get myself into some deep shit, you guys will always be there to pull me up and sometimes, even help me clear those shit off my shoulders. Whenever I get lucky and just feel like sharing some joy, you people will always help amplify the happy spirits and add more joy into it, maybe thats how I learnt that Happiness is both a factor that multiplies and cumulates while Disappointment is a factor that divides and relinquishes.

Experiencing thick and thins with you guys really helped me grow. Issac Newton had a famous quote, "If I have been able to see further, it was only because I stood on the shoulders of giants.". And I'm proud to admit that you guys are real nice shoulders. I will always remember the times when you guys found out something about me, and scrambled around gathering information and literally leaving no stones unturned, turning the house upside down, just to help me seek an answer, and you guys never asked for anything in return. All these help, sometimes get me very guilty when I realized how often I forgets how blessed I am in times of crisis.

Now that we are entering a next phase of our life, I really hope that these friendships can continue and grow. Like a group of intertwined ships, we are captains of our own and have an unique course of our own to sail, yet, we shall brave the rough seas together and bask in the clear sun when the sky's clear. At times, each of us will stray off course, but I strongly believe another ship will be there to direct us back and eventually, we will conclude our journeys at the same port, and let down the anchors together.

Dedicating this kind of post's hard, especially for a guy. But with so little time left, I don't know how else to appreciate you guys, and this seems to be a very good media to translate my thoughts. Its no coincidence that out of so many people, that only the bunch of us remained that coherent through the times. Its intriguing to just think about how friends I make in different occasions and periods in my life can actually come together like as though we all knew each other a long long time ago. Like they say, Great minds think alike, but fools seldom differ. As for whether we are Great Minds or Fools? Its up to you to decide. HAHAS!

So, let us treasure the rest of the days and journey through time together. For time's relative, but experience's cumulative. I shall leave this blog alone for a few days, and lets end it with a phrase I always held close to my heart,

Carpe diem quam minime credula postero!

Ps: As a dear friend, I assume you are smart enough to figure out at least the first 2 words of that phrase. And see the trick to this post with the first letter of each paragraph.

Thank you,

pEyU!

That great sense of excitement and euphoria didn't come to me when I lay down my pen with the resounding "Students, please stop writing, and put down your pen!" from the invigilator. It felt like those dead silence that envelops an area that was just overwhelmed by a catastrophic disaster. Those sudden peaceful yet bitter moments of vacuum. Happy that you survived that disaster, but worry about what's to come next. And its not like the paper was extremely tough, it was rather manageable. So what's the problem?

To be honest, till now I'm not sure. And how I tried to solve the problem? I went swimming right after I leave the examination hall. Its always the best way to clear and relax your mind. Met up with Junrong, Leon and Huiyin who wanted to swim too. Then half way through the 2m deep pool, the lightning alert started to ring, as if it never wanted me to enter it, and the swimming session was over, even before my thoughts get addressed. So i figured the next best thing to sort out the thoughts its to go for a nice game of Pool, from the pool. So the four of us went to Bukit Timah Plaza and Pooled for more than 4hours. Positioning the cue to the ball does align the thoughts, but it was a matter of getting them into the place you want them to. I failed miserably.

2 failed attempts, and I decided to go further to sort these mess. Watching a movie, and what better movie to watch than a disaster movie, 2012. I watched it till 3am, and I was numb by then, and fell asleep before the tsunamis hit the Arks. Woke up late this morning and proceeded with the movie marathon. 3 failed attempts, and I tried to LIFT up my mood by watching UP! like how the old man lift up his house with those colorful balloons. That nostalgic movie in fact, made it worst. Consulted my friends, and they all point out dozens of reasons like an experience Shrink some even pointed out that I'm love sick when I'm not even in one in the very first place. Well, I still have to admit that I do love these helpful friends though. But I still have to come out with a diagnosis after all, and I call it, "Post Exams Syndromes".

Lets hope tmr's outing with some dear friends can help emit the euphoria out of my nostalgia then. Till then.

Happy nor sad.

pEyU!

Its lucky this didn't happen to me.

Hello world. Its been a day. It felt so long. It seems so far. It was like a dream. It's well, IT

I literally suffered from a run-on-the-bank MIND while doing the MAEC paper in the afternoon. The brain cells were panicking, and were withdrawing information from my Mind Bank at lightning speed, as a result, my Memory Bank collapsed and I got hit by a flash recession. It developed into what they call Market Panic, though the term Exams Panic would be more applicable to my situation then. Seriously, I took the longest time to do the simplest question and because I've so little time left, I used the shortest time to do the hardest question. It was a miracle, I can finished the key points at least. Credit should undoubtedly go to my secondary school social-studies/form teacher. She taught me how to write 2 page of words within 10minutes about the government. HAHAHAHs. So thanks Miss Leung!

I finally understand why people say panicking can make one lose his cool. I felt so warm in the freezing cool room and had to take off my jacket halfway and were sweating. My friends thought i was having a fever or something. I'm still wondering why I can generate so much heat without lunch to begin with......

Overall, despite all this, I did enjoy a slow recovery towards the end of the paper, something/someone put me back into my senses with the help of a stimulus package. So well, back to my Statistics. My Stats tutors better not be sadistic tomorrow. 2 more days!

Give me hope,

pEyU!

What better way to escape!

Amidst all the books and pens and notes, I'm glad to say, I'm ready to break-up after 6months of relationship with my dear modules. HAIX. 6 Months passed so quickly, and how often do I wonder whether I've done enough. GOSH, I AM EMOING, thats why breakups are sad, especially when there are more than 3 Subjects involved in the tripartite relationship....

However, at the very moment when this very countdown end, another would begin. The countdown to the Great Escape! I will escape from this sad place and have fun in another place on earth thousands of miles away for more than a month to heal my "wound". HAHAs.That would mean that I've less than 10 days between my breakup and great escape! How am I supposed to survive those 10 days? I'll prolly be stuck in one corner sucking my lollipop, or strolling down the beach alone relieving the disappointments of life, or maybe even lock myself up in the room and blast ZEN music for 10 days staight! I'll definitely run out of Emo-hormones by the end of it. Ah well, unless you people out there wana input some joy into those 10 days before my Great Escape.........such as by asking me out.......

Escaping

pEyU!

Love.

Hello World! Its been real busy recently. Busy not in the sense that i'm doing many things all at one time, but busy because I've only been doing one thing all this time! That's MUGGING. Seriously, I think I've fallen in love.

Dear, its been so long since I know you. Its always been really exciting to know more about you everyday, every week. Till now, I'm still utterly flabbergasted by how it all started, when everyone was desperate, getting their best match. But just so that I saw you, along with my best friends, that attachment started to grow into an affection and soon, an unrelenting infatuation. We've been through thick and thins together, tests after tests. But you've never failed to stand by my side, just as I am with you. Sometimes, you're so attractive, I'd abandon all my friends for you, just so that I can seat with you and interact till the cow comes home. It doesn't matter where we are, in school, outside, or even outside eating, I just can't get enough of you. I know I'll have to part with you soon, but believe me, I'd never forget you, and the experiences we shared. At this final lap before everything ends, that truly tests our relationship and our commitment with each other, and when everything else's seems less important,  I just want to say, I love you, dear Macroeconomics, dear Business Statistics, and dear Financial Market Services. I wouldn't be where I'm without you 3 today, and I promise to treasure every moment I've with you until the end of the final test.

Love,
pEyU!

PS: I've spent more than 40hours with only these 3 and NOBODY ELSE, NOTHING ELSE within 4 days. Aren't I loving enough? HAHAHAs.  They better reciprocate when the exams comes.